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So what are you 'here' for? What is the purpose of your existence?
This is a very basic question that should be easy to answer, since obviously you conduct your life based on some purpose or goal. So, what goal do you conduct your daily existence toward achieving?
Most folks rarely even consider this idea but, nonetheless, perform the tasks of living based on achieving some sense personal satisfaction. Others tend to unconsciously glide through life, rarely considering any ultimate purpose or reason for being. We often do what we think we must, without considering why.
Most define purpose based on a conditioned egoic-perspective. That conditioned perspective is "ME" and the more you can magnify, and press "me" into the world, the more "you" believe you will experience a greater sense of 'self.' Yet, most tend to miss or skip over one important factor.
Without "them" you are nothing.
So let me get right to the point, your only purpose in the world is RELATIONSHIP. You are ‘here’ for that and that only. You have no other purpose and there is NO OTHER reason for your Being and that is "The Heroes Journey." Deep engagement with the others of your world actualizes the 'self' in ways the ego cannot anticipate or prepare for.
Believe it or not, our egoic endeavor to become 'rich' is intricately connected to a belief that wealth will bring others to us. However, this aspect has been abnegated by the ego-self in the pursuit of wealth for wealth’s sake. Make no mistake, wealthy people who recognize wealth as the means of extension and engagement with a world of others, are truly happy people, because they have discovered the meaning and purpose of existence.
Seeking experiences of pleasure and enjoyment are useless unless shared. Could life be enjoyed if you were the only one enjoying it? Living 'life' together is what makes life worth living.
The problem is that you have failed to recognize this basic purpose of life and your egoic self-construct (belief in a "you") pursues a separate happiness, autonomous from others. That purpose has relegated sharing and relationship to the bottom of the barrel. There is no need to seek depth of relating if relationship is of limited importance. Thus, we have finite relationships conditioned on egoic rules that cause us to remain disengaged and empty.
However, we're filled to the brim with other 'stuff,' most of it useless in producing a sustainable "happiness" of any substance
Is it any wonder you are so unhappy and unfulfilled? Is it any wonder you suffer through constant conflict? Is it any wonder you often find solitude or individual pursuits more satisfying than engagement with others? Is it any wonder many turn to alcohol and drugs to "lubricate" (reduce fear) engagement with the world?
Is it any wonder the world in general seems hell bent on mutual destruction. It’s not because you don’t know how to relate to others, since that is as natural as breathing, it’s because you fear deeply relating as that might jeopardize your own personal happiness, which you have evaluated based on so many other things besides relationship.
This is not to say that making money to live comfortably is NOT important or that having pleasurable solitary experiences should be denied. But these goals should be placed in the proper perspective. I regularly meet with couples, often married many years, who come in for therapy because their relationship has eroded to mere dust. They feel alienated and disengaged from one another and find little pleasure in knowing each other and that's primarily because they no longer DO know each other.
Some of them work 60 to 80 hours a week and pull into the parking lot in a brand new SUV Escalade. They have the best of everything. But what they are missing makes it all seem trivial, because they have both become complete strangers to each other.
But it's so much easier to 'love' things than people.
I’ll ask him a question regarding basic beliefs and, after his answer, she’ll surprisingly turn to him with, "I didn’t know you thought that!" I’ll then ask her a similar question and he’ll suddenly respond, "I never knew you felt that way!"
Strangers in a strange world.
From the moment of birth you began inventing a ‘self’ based on relationship with others. You are "you" because of your interdependence with "them." These constructs are rich with possibility, simply because we make up "reality" and define it together, not in solitude or through models of individual success. The world is a 'dream,' but it is a collective dream and we make it "real."
To relate deeply to others, we must know each other deeply and that is your "heroes journey," because through it you may finally overcome your fear of engagement. Otherwise, we remain surface strangers and the world becomes a reflection of nothing more than ripples on the surface since we fear the depths. To swim in the depths literally changes everything.
What about those you have chosen to love and cherish? Do you exist in a "continuum-of-knowing" in which you experience others, and they experience you, in a new way everyday? Or has everything become predictably tedious?
Your old enough now, to swim in the deep end of the pool. Love is discovered within the depths, because it exists nowhere else.